August 17, 2016 “I can’t feel his pulse…”
Those words were spoken about me! Spoken by Mike, an off-duty fire fighter, as he knelt by my unconscious, bleeding body on that early summer morning. He was speaking to Edie C., who’d heard the impact of the pickup truck that hit me head on as I rode my bicycle past her house as she was having breakfast. She’d rushed to help me and put towels on my bleeding leg as Mike assessed my condition before the police and ambulance arrived.
Edie and Mike on the one year anniversary of my accident
I remember nothing about that day. I was in a coma for 2 weeks before going to a rehab hospital. The accident caused broken bones in my leg, ribs, hands and skull, damage to one ear, blood clots in my lungs and a traumatic brain injury. My bicycle fared even worse; she didn’t make it. I was wearing a helmet and running front and rear flashing lights. I was simply unlucky. I don’t really blame the driver. He was late for work; it was rush hour and I was hidden from his view by another car. Doctors told me that the helmet, and my level of fitness, (I was an active 61-year-old) saved me life. So while this was one of the worst days of my life, I was also very lucky, and my life since as been wonderful.
I don’t consider August 17 as a “day that will live in infamy”. Rather it marks a day where I was granted extra innings, and as I recovered, I’ve become more determined not to waste a second of them. And yes, I’m lucky. I’m lucky to have survived and I’m lucky to have returned to a fulfilling life. True my life now is limited: I move and think a little more slowly, I get fatigued more easily, my left leg is a lot weaker than my right one, a sip of red wine gives me an awful headache, and I lost my job. But it could have been a lot worse. I could have died, or survived and ended up more seriously impaired and I’m sure my attitude would have been much gloomier in those circumstances.
“it marks a day where I was granted extra innings, and as I recovered, I’ve become more determined not to waste a second of them”
In point of fact, I now live life more fully than before. I appreciate my family and friends, my home in New England, I feel surer about who I am, what I stand for and how I want to live. I’ve focused on improving the important relationships in my life. I’m more tolerant and less impatient. I’m back riding my bike again. This past winter I skied five days. Oh, and I became a grandfather.
And I don’t deserve all the credit for my progress. I had a lot of help from my community, who supported me as I got back on my feet. And the medical staff who worked with me and encouraged me to push myself; not only did they fix the broken parts of me but they helped me heal my spirit and gave me the will to continue.
I woke up in the hospital wearing wristband with these words on it; FALL RISK., a warning to sit still or I’d fall down and hurt myself even more. What I realized was that I needed to do the opposite of that. I needed, in small and controlled ways, with the assistance of professionals and friends, to RISK FALLING.
And that has been my mantra these past three years. So as August 17th rolls around again (followed in a few months by my 65th birthday!) please join me in toasting life (mine will be a non-alcoholic beer). To a life of adventure, a life of trying new things, a life of discovery and meaning. To a life of Risking Falls.
We’re all capable of it, sometimes it takes a wake up call to get our attention and reminds us we can’t take it for granted. I hope none of you has to go through an accident like mine to get “woke” (as the kids say these days) but I wish for you all the sense of gratitude and understanding this event gave me.
If you like this blog please check out the blogs on my website. Also look out for my upcoming book, FALL RISK, and if you’d like me to come and address your organization, I’d be happy to.